Monday, December 15, 2008
This whole marriage thing has got me thinking lately. As some of you may already know, I've had a reputation to be a bit more liberal than your average LDS gal. My mom actually refers to me as her "liberal" daughter. I've at times struggled to find peace with the notion of traditional gender roles (i.e. the woman raising the children, cooking dinner, doing laundry, cleaning the house, taking the man's last name). Sometimes I can't help but feel animosity towards this old-fashioned, idealistic expectation of women. But oddly enough, I have to admit I am becoming more conservative as I get older. With society headed in the direction it's going (to hell) I have found that I am choosing a more conservative and traditional stance on things. Yes I actually said choose. With this whole new and exciting notion of straying away or not conforming to today's society, I have discovered and learned to appreciate the unforgiving and enormous duty of motherhood and being a wife.
Why is there such a negative stigma with being just a mother in the 21st century? To be just a mother in our current society seems to be selling yourself short, or in otherwords accepting the fact that a mother is all you'll ever be. Being just a mother means you are not educated, you have no ambition and you'd prefer to just stay at home. But is this what motherhood really is? I would argue no. Motherhood is the single most selfless act any woman could do. Giving up your freedom, career, and education is hardly unheroic. When I think of my mother the word "sacrifice" comes to mind. She sacrifices money, time, energy, and her personal sanity for her children and grand-children. She is constantly giving and never taking. Without mothers our society would crumble under its feet.
I'm writing this post prior to getting married in hopes that everyone will realize that I have come to grips with the idea of motherhood. I know it's a long shot but I think it's almost time to stop the "how can I please Ashley?" lifestyle to the "what can I do for other people?". Motherhood provides the opportunity to forget about yourself and serve others. What an amazing way to live your life. Constantly in the service of your children and your family.
I want to give my upmost respect to all of my friends and family members who have chosen to become mothers. It is such a wonderful gift from God to become a mom. And I can hardly wait...for two or three more years. :)