Working. As of lately I have grown to despise working. Since when did reporting to an authoritative figure (your boss) become something we all have to deal with on a daily basis? Shouldn't we all be treated equal? I find my job very stressful and difficult. It's not easy waking up Monday through Friday at 5:30 AM, not only to discipline/babysit 15 and 16 year olds but also to plan lessons, grade, maintain efficient organization, attend mandatory workshops/meetings, maintain comradery with fellow teachers, deal with upset parents, and listen and obey a demanding, yet profoundly tactless principal. My brother worries that someone from my administration will one day read my blog about the atrocities of teaching and fire me. Well brother, don't you worry. My principal, just on Wednesday, referred to me as Ashley "Enger". If she still can't pronounce my last name, I highly doubt she'll spend time online google searching "Ashley Enger".
The point of this post is to publish my envy and jealously of stay-at-home-mom's. Not to say that being a mother isn't a job, but at least you don't have to deal with meeting a higher authority's objectives and outlandish requests. I also discovered the most of us in the work force are pretenders. We pretend we like our bosses to their faces but behind closed doors (or in the hallway at school) our true feelings come to the surface. We as teachers vent our inner most hateful thoughts of superiors. "Why must we be subordinates?!" We cry out. "Why?! Why?!"
I had the pleasure today to attend my good friend Shanna's sealing to her husband Nate. It was awesome. Another awesome event was going to lunch with a few friends afterward. We started talking about getting pregnant and working vs. staying at home, and the overall consensus reached was that yes, staying at home is much better than working. So why, I persistently ask myself, am I working? After marriage comes staying at home then the baby? Or after marriage comes the baby then staying at home. Someone may need to clarify the order of the phrase for me before I quit my job.
My hope is that someone reading this blog can relate to me on some level so I know I'm not alone out there. And to all those stay-at-home moms out there--good for you. You are obviously very intelligent and deserve to be commended for your wise choice in having children.
If you find that I get pregnant much sooner than expected, just read this blog again and you'll know why. Sorry. Not one of my most optimistic posts.
15 comments:
Ash, yesterday was really fun. I always love getting together as girls.....and Dennis (I really do love that he came). I too am looking forward to you having children. You and baby could really add alot to our forever thriving play groups!
You have no idea, trying working in the Military World; they treat us "civilians" like pee ons, and have no use for our "civilian" ways. I work for a LtCol and that's all I can say about that. I can not wait for the day that I become a stay at home mother, it will be much more challenging but the rewards will be endless.
Oh Ash... you hit the nail on the head!!! Yes our conversation yesterday got me thinking too, why am I taking birth control to prevent the joys of staying at home planing your own day, and not having to report to a "boss". But yes kids come with that package (and I wonder how ready I am to be a mom... think back at your shower, I treated Trisha's little girl like a dog!) Can I handle kids??? Maybe I could convince Ezra that I could just thrive as a stay at home wife! What do you think? p.s. I really love Denis! He is such a great guy!
Ashley.. get into home health girl... you never see anyone but your patients!! I love it. My work puts my money in my bank account every two weeks and I may have to go to a couple inservices, but you know me and learning... cant get enough... speaking of that.. since Saren is prego, I have been researching a lot of midwivery skills since I want to birth this baby (seriously:)... I'm thinking of heading back to school... following my dreams
I am so with you! I think it goes have a baby... and then stay home. Or at least that is what I'm HOPING. Ugh. Going back to work gives me a pit in my stomach! I say get prego sooner than later. Amelia needs friends!
you know i don't have to say anything. we have this conversation once a week. can't wait to start planning our families together...xoxo
Hey Ash, I really enjoyed lunch as well on saturday. We need to do it again and come see your place this time. As far as our conversation goes about becoming a mother.. there's nothing better. I am not going to lie, it's a 24/7 job, but every minute of it is so worth it! You can not emagine the love you can have for someone. It's amazing!
I do love this post as I have this debate all the time. Here I am, married for over 5 years and no kids yet. I love my job and absolutely could not imagine doing my job as a therapist. I guess what it comes down to for me is that, well if when I have kids I don't want to go back to work, then I don't go back to work, but if I have kids and then want to work still then I work still. We don't have to have the answer yet and we don't have to hold ourselves to what we say today or the next day. All I know is that I am sure you are a great teacher and you should never undervalue the impact you have on the kids you teach. While I can't wait to have kids and yes I do want them (some people get confused since we have been married for awhile now)I also want to make sure that when we do have them that I am in a position to do either stay at home or work. So way to go to have something you are great at and something that you have worked hard at that you can always do if you want to work. Who knows what you will end up doing, but just go with the flow and do what feels right at the time. CONGRATS on getting married.
If you're looking for a less demanding boss, I'm not sure that a baby is what you need.
I want to see and hear about your wedding and honeymoon. Post some pics!
Ash - just DON'T do what I am doing. Have kids, be FORCED to work for the rest of your life but still try to be a housewife. It STINKS. I have a demanding job and a demanding family and everyone is unhappy. Make sure you have kids because that is what you want to be doing and not because it is a way out of work. If your cute hubby doesn't have a job it won't really matter anyway! Hang in there you get a break for 3 months in 3 months!
FYI - make your blog private and no one will be able to see it you don't want to see it.
You crack me up. Congrats on your big day. About staying at home...I have to say that I am truly grateful and blessed that I am one of those stay at home madres. Agreed that it isn't easy but well worth it. I also have to admit that leaving the work force to stay home may not gurantee avoiding "objectives and outlandish requests." Every day I am greeted with the demands, requests and orders of my fellow mini ninos. Yes, completely different, but I loved the comparison. Enjoy the moments of work while you can, and look forward to the rewards of having little babies. You seem to be doing all the right things in order, keep it up and good luck out there in the world of punching the time clock!
It's not a matter of your principal doing a search on the web for "Ashley Enger" as much as it is a matter of one of your workmates (or anyone for that matter) sending her the link. You're a smart person, you should make smart decisions. This post is not one. Ash, I love you like a sister (because you are), so, forgive me when I say "welcome to the real world." Did you think it was going to be all rosy all the time? I do not blame you for wanting to leave the work behind and be a stay-at-home mom, but until it's feasible, remember, your job puts food on your table and pays for the house you live in.
Love you Ash.
Ty
i found you. lets blog. but not a lot.
Ash - I sort of think you will get fired one of these days for a post you write. Either fired or let go after you get sued. I can't decide. Either way, don't always think that grass in greener on the other side. You'll miss the days without kids once you have them, so enjoy them now. You said something about getting up at 5:30 am? Well... you'll be getting up at 12:00, 2:30, 5:30, and then won't be able to take a nap later. Trust me, you will regret not taking advantage of these kidless days if you don't.
Plus you suck for not calling me. Tell Dennis what up.
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